Helpless
by sashsweetie
Summary: After Zoey was taken at the end of Season 4. Thoughts of the different members of the administration and Bartlet family.
1. Chapter 1

CJ knew to stay silent as she and Amy chased Abbey towards the briefing room. She knew to stay silent as tears ran down Abbey's face, as Amy told her what she'd done wrong, something Abbey already knew. She knew the best thing to do was to take Abbey somewhere private, away from Amy, away from the staring faces of worried staff, away from everything. So she took her to her office, and stayed silent as Abbey silently broke down beside her, Abbey's hand gently in her own. She stayed with her during the doctor's visit, and wished to all God she could be the one leading Abbey back to the Residence as she watched Amy take her home to stay with her until the sedatives kicked in and she could be taken briefly away from her pain.

But CJ had a different place in this administration, so instead she was forced to watch, pained, as Abbey's husband renounced his power to his opponent, who couldn't help but stamp upon the President's pride in the process. So she looked on, powerless to act, as Jed Bartlet signed away his Presidency and went to join his wife to pray, to cry, to await news and the arrival of their other daughters.

She and the others were left behind to try and cope with following orders from a leader they did not trust to make the right decisions. She could see the rest of them felt the same, even those who didn't feel the President should be leading the country at present. They followed Leo like sheep, knowing he would make the right decisions and hoping he could convince their new leader.

But their minds were elsewhere. Their thoughts were with a young girl who they considered a daughter or a younger sister, wondering and hoping that she could be found safe and returned to them unharmed. Their thoughts were with her parents in the Residence, where the President tortured himself by watching the news playing clips of his lost daughter's childhood, Charlie beside him, while Abbey lay momentarily unconscious, her pain taken away briefly by a sedative.

And none of them ever lost hope.


	2. Chapter 2

_Who was she meant to be angry at?_ Abbey wondered dimly as she listened to the service. Jed? God? The nameless people who had taken her daughter away from her? Jean Paul? She couldn't help but be angry at her husband. If it weren't for his job….she sighed, tears running silently down her cheeks. In the end, it didn't even matter who she was angry at. It didn't bring her Zoey home.

……

Donna felt numb as she looked out across the glowing landscape of candles and treasures that made up a shrine for Zoey. She had never imagined… "Oh my God" she whispered, her voice barely audible. Josh silently reached for her hand, entwining his fingers in hers, and together they walked into the throng of people.

… …

Ellie stood beside her father, her pale face solemn. She was his sole ally now, the only one who tried to understand things from his point of view. He was the President, he couldn't help the things that happened to them because he was the figurehead for America. He did his best. She couldn't be angry with him for that. She could only love him.

……

Leo sat head in hands in his office. He had told Toby he was going home, but couldn't face doing so. His mind raced and his heart was divided between his love for his country and his love for his oldest friend. He didn't even know if choosing one meant he had to betray the other.

……

Toby lay in bed awake. He knew he wanted see Andy and his twins. But he feared she wouldn't see them as their children. She saw them as _her_ children, he was sure, and he was afraid of the pain attachment would bring him if that were true. He would end up where the President stood now, faced with the loss of his own daughter.

……

Freezing cold, Zoey Bartlet whimpered in the darkness where no-one could hear her.

……


	3. Chapter 3

CJ watched Zoey's black and blue face carefully as her father walked her around the garden, watching the brief ripple of fear cross her face as flashbulbs started going off before Zoey steeled herself and waved to the cameras, smiling. She could see Abbey watching too, for the telltale signs that would let her know what her daughter was really feeling. Abbey could see through her children better than her husband, CJ knew.

……

She couldn't bring herself to sleep with him, just as she couldn't bring herself to forgive him. The strong woman she Abbey Bartlet was was still present in full force, but so was her anger. And it was directed at Jed. She couldn't exist here, in his environment any longer. She needed, as Zoey did, to return to her own. To Manchester. She needed staff members out of her life. So she closed everyone out until she could leave. She simply dismissed them from the Residence. She didn't blame Leo, or CJ, or Josh, or Toby…she just couldn't help but direct her anger at them too, by virtue of their association with her husband. It was better to avoid them. So she left, taking Zoey with her.

……

CJ watched the motorcade depart under the first bursts of light from the fireworks. She had guessed Abbey was going to leave. She had seen the blame that lay in her eyes not only during Zoey's absence, but upon her return. The administration was falling out from under them, despite the move to a twenty-four hour day from the President down to the lowest assistant. Anyone with eyes could see that they were drowning.

……

Donna watched Josh and Amy surreptitiously from behind a curtain of hair. Something had happened, she knew. She had realised, when Amy asked, that she was in love with Josh, just as Amy was. But Donna was the best friend, the little sister, someone to joke with, drink a beer with, but not to be romantic with. Never to be touched. A china doll on a shelf that just begged to be loved by a child with huge eyes too short to reach it. She could remember the look that lit_ his_ eyes each time he saw her for what she could be to him. But he pushed the idea away as quickly as she did whenever it came up; dismissing it for gossip, or a misunderstanding of their relationship. They couldn't function without each other, but neither would they ever dare to take things a step further, to see if their relationship could survive as a romantic one, for fear of loss of ability to survive. They were symbiotes. But it killed them.


End file.
